To Jonghyun: my last goodbye.

8 de abril de 1990 - 18 de dezembro de 2017

I can´t really name the things that I'm feeling right now. Is it sadness? Is it guiltiness? I really, really don’t know, but I’m so sorry. I cried the whole day yesterday and I’m still crying. It hurts. Everything seems so unreal. I never knew you were suffering, but I’m so sorry, so sorry. I’m sorry that this happened to you and that the world that we live is ugly and dark. I hope there’s no darkness around you anymore, please just be okay, not for me or your fans, neither your family, but only for yourself. You deserve this, deserve to be okay, to rest in piece and I really hope that you’re getting what you deserve.
I promise you that I will pay more attention now, read the signs between the lines. I have friends that need me now and I will take care of them, I will. I promise you that I won’t hurt myself anymore either. I promise you that eventually I will stop crying.
I’m not a religious person, but if there’s is a place after death, I want you to be there. I hope that everyone who loved you are okay and I hope they will find their piece too.
Thank you, Jonghyun, for being an amazing person. Thank you. I won’t remember you as “the guy who killed himself”, I will remember as the talented artist and a wonderful human being. There are so many great things about you that I won’t let people forget it. I’ve always admired you. You will never be forgotten.
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for trying, thank you for surviving, thank you for your life.
I love you, Jonghyun.
Goodbye.